So I am on day 6 of the Lupron shots. Afternoon headaches...check, mood swings and anger...check, hunger at all hours...check, dreading the thought of daily shots...Double CHECK!
All of this is going to be worth it in the end when we have a baby of our own. I just keep biting my hand (yes I bite my hand when the Mr. is injecting me) and moaning in pain for us to have this baby. Of course all of this goes along with the praying, the begging, the crying and the depression. I am trying my very best to keep up beat. We keep planing trips, planing fun times, going out with friends, laughing and trying not to let my mood swings anger either of us. (Thank you God for such a wonderful Husband, he really is great through all of this).
As for the anger part, man I'd like to say I like this, I feel like a tough girl all of a sudden. But I really don't. I don't like the feeling of wanting to hit or yell at everyone all the time. I really wish this part would go away.
I called Dr. BabyMaker's office today because I couldn't remember if I was suppose to call when I started my cycle or not. Nurse says, no no you are fine just come see us in 10 days. Its weird ya know...not seeing them every few days. I know we will get back to that again, but I feel like I am left in a waiting room for an appointment that was suppose to happen hours ago...forgotten about.
All I can think about is, will this work? Can this work? Will this finally be our turn? Can I suddenly be like the rest of my friends and be happy again? Will a baby actually come out of this? Is this all worth it?
Still knowing (me, the ye of little faith) that faith as small as a mustard see can move mountains.
I am trying hard hard to have faith bigger than that mustard seed, trying to see the positives in everything and most of all trying to love a body that just won't cooperate.
Come on body, prepare for the impending egg growth, hatching and incubating.
No comments:
Post a Comment